The Ninth Strange Day

Weblogs ‘need content warnings’

Readers should be warned when they are reading blogs that may contain “crude language”, a draft blogging code of conduct has suggested.

The code of conduct was drawn up by Tim O’Reilly.

Blogs which are open and uncensored should post an “anything goes” logo to the site to warn readers, the code suggests.

Readers of these blogs would be warned: “We are not responsible for the comments of any poster, and when discussions get heated, crude language, insults and other “off colour” comments may be encountered. Participate in this site at your own risk.”

Okay. Fine. You want a warning? Here’s one:

No nudity; No sexual material; No violence; Profanity or swearing; Mild expletives; Content that sets a bad example for young children: that teaches or encourages children to perform harmful acts or imitate dangerous behaviour; User generated content may be, but is not known to be, present.

Further warnings include:

• For external use only
• Do not eat toner.
• May irritate eyes.
• Knives are sharp.
• Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert muffin, eat.
• This Product Warps Space and Time in Its Vicinity.
• Despite Any Other Listing of Product Contents Found Hereon, the Consumer is Advised That, in Actuality, This Product Consists Of 99.9999999999% Empty Space.

Due to the possibility that a common notion of ethics are not universally shared by all sentient beings, and that therefore the manufacturer may have entirely different concept of “fairness”, “equity”, “honesty”, and “integrity” than the consumer, the consumer should not expect the product purchased to conform in any way to the advertised properties of the product.

This website should be removed from its packaging before heating in a microwave. It is not to be used outdoors or in the shower. This website is not to be used as a personal flotation device. Prolonged use may cause drowsiness. As with all websites, there is a possibility of dependency. Do not use A Strange Day for more than six days without consulting with your doctor. Common side effects are nausea, restlessness, dizziness, and migraine. Discontinue use if these side effects become bothersome. Rash or intestinal distress may be signs of a more serious condition. Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant should not use A Strange Day because of a risk of certain birth defects. You can catch STDs and The Gay from toilet seats. Brush your teeth twice a day, every day, with a fluoride toothpaste. Do not drink more than two bottles of wine per day. Send money to DataAngel. DataAngel may or may not be a sociopath. Err on the side of caution and send the money. Men named “Rock” and “Crusher” and “Rock Crusher” are not fucking around when they ask you for the money you owe them. Pay up and no one gets hurt. This website may contain swearing.

Edit: daffyd Says:

Erections that are generated by this blog, lasting more than 4 hours will require:

1. medical attention
or
2. a gaggle of “ladies of the evening”

Consult your lawyer prior to taking astrangeday.net.

You have been warned.

Dear United States,

Not everyone is Christian, you know. There is no need for everything in the world to be closed today. Considering WalMart is open on Christmas, why is it closed on Easter?

It’s like “28 Days Later” out there. Just a bunch of confused people wandering around, peering in dark windows.

The only things open are Barnes & Nobel and Starbucks. Books and coffee, man. Sure that’s all I need to survive, but I was bored and I wanted to spend money!

My great-uncle (As in Mim’s uncle. But he’s also pretty high on the nifty scale, so he’s also a great … uncle…) “Dai Fu” (because no one in our family has a real name. Even Mim’s “real” name isn’t really her name, and neither is mine. That’s just how we roll.)

Wait. Let me start this again.

My great-uncle Dai Fu emailed me to wish me a happy birthday and asked me if I remembered what I was doing thirty-six years ago. I wrote back and said “Same thing I’m doing now. Sleeping and complaining.”

My personality formed very early in life.

Oh. I had a birthday. I’m thirty-six now.

Some friends of mine decided they were going to try their hand at Project 365 and I thought I’d give it a go, too.

The concept is simple. You take one photo a day, every day, for a year. You get a visual record of the year and you get better at taking pictures. Easy enough, right?

We’ll see how it goes.

I’m going to officially start on 6 April, 2007. My birthday. I thought that’d be a good starting point.

I’ll be posting them here.

But sorry. I had to.

A “Peter and Claude” fanvid. Contains spoilers for “Heroes”.