Blasphemy!
This guy getting off the bus tonight said “Have a blessed evening everyone. And don’t forget what God’s done for you.”
I turned to Kitti. “I’ve forgotten! Do you think that means I forgot to send him a thank you card?”
Kitti shook his head. “I know what God can do for me. He can go to work for me so I can stay home and work on music.”
“What has God done for us?” I asked, trying very hard not to let that Paula Abdul song into my head (it didn’t work).
“He made Sa’am really sick and we had to put him down.”
“But he did create John Barrowman. That counts for something, I think. But then he turned around and gave me diabetes. This isn’t looking good for God.”
There’s a billboard that says “Abstinence works every time.” Kitti and I argued about it briefly. I pointed out that really, it does prevent pregnancy.
“Who can really be abstinent, though? I mean it doesn’t stop priests.”
“Don’t be silly,” I said. “Gay sex doesn’t cause babies.”
Now we’re trying to decide if we want to go back and edit the sign to say “Absinthe works every time” or “Abstinence and homosexuality work every time”.
Decisions, decisions.
December 15th, 2007 at 1:20 am
How ’bout: “Abstinence works every time, but letting a priest stick it in your pooper will get you a nice settlement.”